cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
