Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
