if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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