everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
