he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
