Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
