What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
