whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
