is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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