Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
