You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
this will be a night to untag.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
