let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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