i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
