Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
