what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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