Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
