Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
