I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
