I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
These tits shall not be calmed
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize