I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
he shaved USA in his pubs
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
My vagina is officially offended.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Randomize
