she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
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