You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
