You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
