Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
