Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize