we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
You pole danced in your parka.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
