Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Randomize