what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize