My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
My feet surprised me
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
