You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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