Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Randomize