So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
