Me too!
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize