Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
