Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
