Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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