OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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