Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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