the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
handjob tips. give me some.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize