I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize