I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
