i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
