We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
