U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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