I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
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