The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I wish I only lived at night.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
