Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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