It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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