opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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