That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I think my vagina is haunted
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
The air was thick with penises
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
