apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
