You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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