that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
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